Distanced but not Disconnected
Some of my favourite people live in Australia, specifically in Melbourne, so when a second lockdown was announced, my heart ached for my friends and their families.
No doubt these lockdowns prevent the spread of what has been a terrible virus, tragically effecting so many, yet there is a part of me that is aware that loneliness can sometimes feel just as devastating.
In the UK, when the lockdown was at its strictest, I was incredulous to see so many elderly people out and about. The roads were deserted, going out for my daily exercise was an eerie, strange experience in newly abandoned streets. There was no noise, save the cry of the seagulls overhead, no hustle and bustle. Why were these older people risking themselves?
Loneliness. To be locked away from the world, not to interact with a soul was simply a worse fate than death.
Before the pandemic, I remember conversations with friends, how glad we were we could recall a time pre-internet; the days of dial-up, the frustration when someone wanted the phone and you just wanted to chat with your mates on MSN Messenger! Yet, much as I still feel a little resentful that technology is now ingrained in our culture, when I imagine what a pandemic would be like without it, I am nothing short of grateful.
No doubt it is still tough, no doubt there is still fear and uncertainty but despite all of the pressures of staying safe, it is so important we stay connected.
At the press of a button we have access to our friends and families, perhaps not in the flesh but to see expressions, to hear voices, how wonderful is that? My mum had a very old phone pre-Covid-19, but now she’s upgraded we can FaceTime, it gives me hope that should something happen again, we will always be able to keep in touch.
If you’re living alone and you’re in lock-down, looking after yourself is absolutely key. Find things to do which make you happy alongside having those catch-ups with friends. It could be cooking a beautiful meal for yourself, reading that book you’ve put off for ages, learning a new language…it can be really easy to let this time pass us by but we can still invest in ourselves and find new ways of doing so.
Of course, this time isn’t just about us, we do also need to reach out to our friends, I’m a single woman but I don’t expect that a pandemic has been much fun for my married friends either. After all, you can be the best couple ever, but spending 100% of your time with one other person isn’t healthy even if you love them to pieces! And put kids in the mix, I think I’d be desperate for some different conversation.
So, whilst we may think as singles, families have it easier, let’s not assume. Checking in on people can mean the world, even if it feels like a small thing to do.
I really hope and pray that isolation is a time where we can be supportive, kind and caring, even if it is from a physical distance. Mia sent a care package to a friend during the first lock-down and I know I’ve gotten closer to certain friends simply because I’ve made a conscious decision to contact them every week. Whilst none of us can be certain of the future for the moment, let’s invest in those people we love, whether it’s our time, money or resources. Let’s be willing to be honest, to share and to find new ways of creating community. If you don’t have that right now, why not reach out to us at She’s So Lovely? We love you girls and we want this be more than podcasts and blogs but about sisterhood and building global friendships!
How-to Iso:
Learn a new language - I’m revisiting French on the free language app Duo Lingo but there are loads to try!
Try an online class - It might be a home workout, yoga…it’s up to you
Deep & meaningfuls - Have a coffee with a girlfriend over Zoom or if it’s government approved, meet up for a socially-distanced walk
Check in - There are a lot of people who will be finding this time tough too, so take the time to text, email and call
You time - Prime opportunity to goal set, get real with where you’re at in terms of inner growth and re-look at life in a deeper way
Have a cry - Sometimes you gotta let it out, and that’s okay!
Finances - Less luxury brunches might give you a chance to get your ducks in a row, what are your dreams? House, car, travel?
Hobbies - If you haven’t got one, you need at LEAST one. It’s does so much for us as individuals
Get outdoors - Walking, running, cycling, whatever you can do to be outdoors in a safe way, try to at least once a day
Stay safe,
